Morty sings Taylor Swift. It’s actually the best thing ever. Like, ever.

A line-by-line analysis of Macklemore’s “Thrift Shop.”

Bruce Springsteen not to perform at A&O Blowout, just like fucking last year.

A line-by-line translation and analysis of Psy’s “Oppan Gangnam Style.”

A line-by-line analysis of Wildcat anthem “Put Your Hands Up in the Air!”

Hey, we heard you were a Wildcat: More evidence NU rocks.

Evander Jones releases his first single, “White and Purple (Sherman Ave Remix).”

Dillo Day, as told by a real live drunk person.

Breaking News: NATO Representatives have elected to stick around the Chicagoland area to attend Dillo Day.

Evander Jones’ review of Joe Pug’s performance at Lincoln Hall last Friday night.

ParrtyCat’s track-by-track review of Train’s latest album California 37.

An incoming Freshman made a rap for us. It is suitably heinous.

So proud to introduce our newest writer Gwyneth Effingmouth, who starts things off with a list of other possible directions to take One Direction, all with the charm of a Fleet Foxes album.

Apparently our editorial staff has a problem with the whole “not accosting children” thing. The latest victim: attendees of last night’s Miley Cyrus concert.

Brother Jürgen Taintsdorf explains precisely why the 2012 Lollapalooza Lineup gives him a boner.

Sir Edward Twattingworth III’s 1500-word line-by-line analysis of Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe.”

If only people knew about Nickelback, the world would be a better place.

The Welcome serenade us after dinner for the first-ever installment of “Live at the Ave.”

Simon rants about Paul McCartney and his documentary The Love We Make.

Nothing says “Valentine’s Day” like Bristol Bacchus’ suggestions for a breakup playlist.

Our review of the debut album Extremities by a cappella group Extreme Measures.

Blaise Bernard’s close literary analysis of Wiz Khalifa’s “Roll Up.”

Ross Packingham nearly blows himself just thinking about his experience at Maroon 5′s June 30th show at Ravinia.

In a shocking turn of events, Sir Edward Twattingworth III actually apologizes for his behavior regarding Rebecca Black.

Evander Jones’ review of Michigan Rex’s EP “Cities to Burn.”

Alison Decker’s review of Girl Talk’s March 5th performance at the Congress Theater.

The Welcome’s debut EP “The Welcome:” almost as great as donuts from The Depot.

Evander Jones’ list of the Top Ten songs that are guaranteed to facilitate the best love-making sessions of your life this Valentine’s Day.

Catch this fan video of an early practice by the soon-to-be Kites and Swans.

Our review of Best Coast/Wavves February 8th show at Lincoln Hall.

Millions of hipsters who were totally into The White Stripes before we were mourn as the band announces its break-up.

Alpha Delta’s new hit single “Harry Fucking Potter” bewitches Northwestern students worse than a Bat-Bogey Hex. Read Evander Jones’ review HERE.

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