It’s finally winter break — a chance to relax, finish up the new Netflix series you weren’t supposed to start watching until after finals week, and reunite with old high school friends. You haven’t seen these guys in less than a month, so it’s important that you spend the valuable time you have together doing a variety of fun bonding activities that will give you plenty of time to catch up with one another on the exciting events that surrounded your reading and finals weeks. Here are a few of the places that may help along the bromancing (or homancing). Continue reading
Want to have a Christmas experience like we do at the Ave?
Here are just a few things you’ll need to make sure you have a Merry Heinmas:
1. Ugly sweaters, Santa hats, and reindeer antlers
Just the basics.
Lots and lots of alcohol. You wouldn’t want to hang out with your closest friends and family sober, now would you?
3. A good present
Suggestions: leather handcuffs, a framed picture of kittens, 300 pages of your Japanese homework, porn, three copies of a book that literally nobody likes, coal.
We’re just a few short weeks away from the beginning of internship application season, or if you’re not in school, “another week of trying to get employed” season. Writing a resumé is a surefire way to decimate your confidence as a hirable individual. Fortunately, you can ride the depressing low of the holidays and insert your relatives’ opinions of you to round out the “special abilities” section of your already tepid resumé.
The most commonly uttered comment by relatives. It’s safe and probably true. Now you can reach things most people can’t, or at least reach things that children can’t, like a Continue reading
With winter break upon us, many of us will be back at home spending time with our families. To some of us, this sounds like a great chance to reunite with the people you love the most. However, to many of us, this is a nightmarish scenario that you have dreaded since you left for school. Have no worries, we here at Sherman Ave are ready to guide you through interactions with every family member this holiday season (And by “holiday season,” I really mean Christmas, because Hanukkah is over and there has yet to be sufficient proof that Kwanzaa exists).
What to expect: You know he’s going to be an asshole from the get go. He will be asking questions about your grades before he says hello. That’s just his style. The trick here is not giving away that you regularly sleep until 1 pm and don’t go to most of your classes. If you keep the jig up, he might just keep paying for tuition.
Make sure to say: “It’s like a common Northwestern practice to drop two classes.”
Mom Continue reading
AHHHHHHYEAAAAAAYYYYY YOU’RE GOING TO NERDWESTERN NORTHWESTERN NORTHWASTED !!!!!
Congratulations. Sincerely. You took 7 or 8 AP exams and scored somewhere 33+ on your ACT* You wrestled away your school’s student presidency from that fucking bitch Katie Taylor and you sacrificed a healthy sleep schedule for that batch of A pluses.
It’s all paid off.
Let me start out by saying that I know y’all have a tough job. I get it, homies. Main Library is a large, confusing building and also one of the ugliest things ever conceived by the human mind. And, as far as I can tell, the facilities management staff has zero employees. So I understand that you have kind of a tall mountain to climb in your quest to, you know, do your job.
But Jesus CHRIST guys. I don’t know that I’ve been witness to so much rampant incompetence and obvious lack of hustle since I saw JerShon Cobb wearing a “Lazy but Talented” shirt in Plex dining hall. And I think maybe we need to talk about it. Continue reading
“I completely failed that final”: I’d estimate that I got an 82% on that final.
“I honestly haven’t even started studying”: Besides these notes I took, all the lectures I attended and readings I did, and this handy little study guide I drafted up.
“We get a one-page cheat sheet, but I don’t think it’ll really help”: I will put the entirety of human knowledge on that sheet in size .25 font. Continue reading
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), commonly called ‘Winter Blues’, is a type of depression which most commonly manifests itself during the fall and winter months. Understanding the causes and signs of SAD is important to avoiding falling into depression during the cold winter months ahead.